Want source material so you can follow along? Slate, October 22.
Ultra Hyper Fighting Championship Edition IV Alpha Happy Yum Yum Wow:
1. If it were any other girl, you'd think "he's fucking her." And rightly so. Creepy!
2. Lecherous guests hit on you. You show them painting. Say "no real thing, sorry."
3. He's dead to you, may as well be dead to her. Sounds fair, you slut.
4. Tell security. Film response. Put it on YouTube. Send me the link. Comedy gold!Midterms? Done. Grades? 3.9. Me: Kool-Aid Man. "Oh yeah!"
(as an aside, #3 is causing a monumental shitstorm. Apparently "good writers" aren't allowed the occasional challenge to themselves to see who they can offend.)